I remember how badly I wanted to be an adult when I was a kid. I imagined this beautiful future where I could make my own decisions as a “big girl.” Surely, by then, I would know what I wanted, where I was going, and exactly how to get there.
I don’t think I was alone in that.
I am an adult now. And boy, have some of those beliefs changed.
Being busy means being productive. For a long time, a full calendar made me feel accomplished. I know better now. Being busy and being productive are not the same thing.
Exhaustion is not proof that I have used my time well. Sometimes, the most productive thing I can do is rest.
You need to know where you are going before you start. I wanted the destination, the map, and preferably a detailed itinerary before taking the first step.
Life has taught me that plans change. Sometimes we change too. Not knowing exactly where I am going does not necessarily mean I am lost. Sometimes, it simply means that I am still becoming.
Every answered prayer must have a definite explanation. I used to think that eventually, I would understand why certain things happened the way they did. I no longer need every piece of the puzzle to fit.
Some answered prayers will forever remain shrouded in mystery, and I am learning that understanding is not always a prerequisite for gratitude.
Closure should come from other people. I once thought closure required a conversation, an explanation, an apology, or some final acknowledgment from the person who hurt me. But what happens when none of that comes?
At some point, I realised that my peace could not depend on someone else’s willingness to give it to me. Sometimes, closure is simply accepting that you may never get the answer you wanted.
Getting older automatically makes you wiser. I beg to differ. While age gives us experience, wisdom comes from what we choose to do with it. It requires reflection, humility, and the willingness to admit when we were wrong.
Getting older is inevitable. Becoming wiser is a choice.
You should have everything figured out by a certain age. This may be the biggest lie I believed about adulthood. I had an imaginary timeline for everything. Adulthood has taught me that there is no universal timeline for becoming who you are meant to be.
Some people figure things out early. Others take a few wrong turns. Some change careers, relationships, cities, dreams, and sometimes entire versions of themselves. This does not mean that they failed. Sometimes, it means that they were paying attention.
Maybe adulthood is not about finally having all the answers. Maybe it is about becoming comfortable enough to admit when you do not. I am sure there are things I believe today that my future self will question. And honestly, I hope there are. Because growth is not always about knowing more. Sometimes, it is about being willing to change your mind.
What about you? Are there things that you believed about adulthood that you have since changed your mind about? I would love to hear yours.
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Diane
