Okay, I admit the title may just be a bit harsh but still, you know what they say about the truth huh?
So what’s the truth? No matter how hard and emotionless we project ourselves, most of us want to love, be loved, and have someone to call ours. To be clear, this is the undeniable truth for most people. And if you are part of the minority who don’t, that’s okay too.
In my previous post titled “On Keeping Standards”, I made a few points about the pressure society mounts on single ladies. This more often than not does more harm than good because as time passes, standards drop, and we see ladies ready to jump on the next available man that crosses their radar.
And they fail to see the line signaling the cross into desperation.
I had a discussion about this with a friend last week. He said some guys are flattered with the attention of ladies without a doubt. However, this feeling may prove to be ephemeral unless the ladies have hidden layers underneath, interesting enough to make them want a repeat contact. I quite agree with this.
Ladies, be selective about the information about yourself a guy becomes privy to. He does not need to know every single detail about your life on the first date.
Come on, where is the mystery that makes him work hard to know more about you? The goal is to be an onion with many layers rather than an egg.
When you are too scared to be alone, you readily jump into any relationship and take whatever it dishes out. You’ll find that a lot of the times, desperate people are perceived as options to be either exploited or avoided. Of course, this increases your chances of being heartbroken since you have become available to just about any jerk out there.
This isn’t a man-hate post. All I am saying is that we need to focus on developing ourselves and pursuing our passions and this will strategically position us as better partners that guys would want to be around.
Let him know and understand that you aren’t sitting by the phone waiting for it to ring whenever he remembers to call. Let him understand that you have your pursuits and interests, which will communicate an air of confidence that is hard to miss.
Finally, let love happen naturally. Stop rushing the process. It will come when it will, and sometimes at times we least expect it.
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Love,
Diane
